Forgiveness and Grace...For Some

This one is not going to be funny (or in most of my posts, an attempt at being funny) this is just gonna be a brother working through some complex thoughts on a divisive situation. This week Amber Guyger was found guilty of the murder of Botham Jean, and subsequently was sentenced to 10 years. And while some rightfully expressed anger and outrage over the 10 year sentence she received there were a couple of things that perturbed a brother.

First off, as soon as the guilty verdict came down there was elation. For once it seemed that when a truly innocent person was killed by a police officer, there would be accountability. I was shocked when she was charged and even more so when she was convicted. A very happy shocked I must say. But then the verdict came and it was for ten years. People were upset, and rightfully so, then the wave of people who seemingly took joy in the shock and hurt that such a relatively light sentence could be given when the circumstances surrounding the case were just so damning. 

"I'm so sorry...that I am being punished for my actions."

She didn't administer aid, seemed in texts during the aftermath to be more concerned with her lost career not to mention rather racist texts that came to light later. An almost joyful refrain proclaiming how smart they were for having no hope of justice or mocking derision of those upset. As I said on twitter, I never want to see the day when I mock another person for being upset when a miscarriage of justice has occurred.

The other thing that bothered me was a moment. Botham Jean's brother gave the killer his forgiveness and it's being hailed as this great moment. And for me, it's just not. Now this doesn't apply to family, as they are allowed to do whatever helps them in their healing. However, the media pumping this up as this beautiful moment frankly disgusts me. So much grace and forgiveness shown to people who for one have not asked for it and second don't deserve it from the bulk of us. This smacks of the Charleston Church shooter trial. When apprehended he was hungry so police stopped and got him a goddamn sandwich, meanwhile little black girls are getting suplexed at pool parties. I've seen judges react with zero emotion as they hand down family altering sentences yet Amber gets a goddamn hug from the judge. She even had security guards brushing the hair out of her face.

Black and brown bodies are brutalized and yet instead of focusing on that, the focus is seemingly always put on the humanity of the brutalizer. We have to make sure Dylan Roof is not hungry, we have to make sure Amber Guyger isn't made to feel like less than a human when the focus should be on Botham Jean. The guy who was sitting in his home, chilling until a horny cop who at best was wildly incompetent to ever carry a badge killed him. This isn't a beautiful moment. So while the family is free to grieve how they grieve, and are free to forgive who they want to forgive, this doesn't mean you can use their forgiveness as a means to shame people who are rightfully angry. If all you can focus on is his forgiveness and not Botham Jean's humanity then it is nothing more than a means to silence the conversation which may lead you to some uncomfortable truths about yourself.

A writer who I am fond of, David Dennis Jr. said it best in a piece he wrote: “And I’m angry that the examples of the courts getting sentencing right or using compassion for criminals often come when its a white person on the wrong side of the judge’s stand. I don’t want Amber Guyger to be treated like a Black person. I want Black people to be treated like Amber Guyger.”